I have decided to blog about my "weight loss journey" (I hear people call it that all the time, so it must be the correct thing to do). Honestly, I really don't know why I'm doing this other than I'm at home with nothing to do except laundry, and this seems exponentially more interesting.
I started this whole mess a little more than 2 weeks ago and for reasons I cannot explain, it has taken on a life of its own. Apparently, if I'm not being controlled by food, I'm being controlled by the lack of it. Either way, it just keeps kicking me around.
Food and I have had a strange relationship for pretty much my entire life. I can remember holding a Moon Pie in my hand at the age of 11 or 12 and desperately trying to rationalize eating it. I knew I didn't need it, but I was bored and it was more fun than staring out the window. Seems this odd pattern of food rationalization has followed me for decades. In fact, I rarely choose to eat anything without a mental struggle equivalent to mud wrestling an anaconda. Quite frankly, I'm over it.
I have gained and lost the same 50 or 60 pounds over and over again in the span of 16 years. That is so messed up; it shocks me to see it in print! I don't know of a diet that I haven't tried. Here's the short list: LA Weight Loss, Atkins, Weight Watchers, First Place, The Monkey Diet (I might explain this one at another time. Then again, maybe not.) , South Beach, Cabbage Soup Diet, Organic Food Diet. I'll stop, as I'm sure you get the point. I heard of a diet called the Israeli Army Diet. I didn't actually check into it....but I thought about it.
It goes without really saying, I'm searching for something. So maybe this is more about me coming to grips with what God knows is best for ME, plain and simple. I know He is showing me some things about myself that aren't very pretty. I also know He has a plan, which unlike all my other weight loss plans, works perfectly for ME.
I am trusting Him each day to give me a new appreciation for food that I would normally dismiss without much thought, a new understanding of why some foods are just not good choices for ME, and a desire to have a heart like His through all of it.
I started this whole mess a little more than 2 weeks ago and for reasons I cannot explain, it has taken on a life of its own. Apparently, if I'm not being controlled by food, I'm being controlled by the lack of it. Either way, it just keeps kicking me around.
Food and I have had a strange relationship for pretty much my entire life. I can remember holding a Moon Pie in my hand at the age of 11 or 12 and desperately trying to rationalize eating it. I knew I didn't need it, but I was bored and it was more fun than staring out the window. Seems this odd pattern of food rationalization has followed me for decades. In fact, I rarely choose to eat anything without a mental struggle equivalent to mud wrestling an anaconda. Quite frankly, I'm over it.
I have gained and lost the same 50 or 60 pounds over and over again in the span of 16 years. That is so messed up; it shocks me to see it in print! I don't know of a diet that I haven't tried. Here's the short list: LA Weight Loss, Atkins, Weight Watchers, First Place, The Monkey Diet (I might explain this one at another time. Then again, maybe not.) , South Beach, Cabbage Soup Diet, Organic Food Diet. I'll stop, as I'm sure you get the point. I heard of a diet called the Israeli Army Diet. I didn't actually check into it....but I thought about it.
It goes without really saying, I'm searching for something. So maybe this is more about me coming to grips with what God knows is best for ME, plain and simple. I know He is showing me some things about myself that aren't very pretty. I also know He has a plan, which unlike all my other weight loss plans, works perfectly for ME.
I am trusting Him each day to give me a new appreciation for food that I would normally dismiss without much thought, a new understanding of why some foods are just not good choices for ME, and a desire to have a heart like His through all of it.
You go girl! I am excited to read about your "journey"...mzybe it will inspire me to do the same...lol!!
ReplyDeleteKelly, that's exactly what I wanted to hear! In many ways we are all in the same crappy, leaky boat! So I'm hoping to just have fun with it!
ReplyDelete