Skunks, Excercise and Why I Can't Have a Gun

   Last night for the first time in years, I felt the urge (I might even use the word desire) to exercise! For the life of me I can’t imagine what on earth snapped inside my head to cause the idea of making such an effort! It’s truly beyond me. 

 

   I would love to report that I followed through with this maddening idea, but alas, I merely peered out the window and starred at the very street I needed to be running up and down.   I nursed this idea for some time actually, it wasn’t simply a fleeting thought.  But I never acted on it.   I’m just as confused by the mystery of why I didn’t do it, as I am by the very fact that I considered it in the first place.  The whole episode was odd at best.

   Earlier this week my hubby informed me he was going to a gun show (insert sound of loud snoring).  I don’t care anything at all about guns (mostly because no one will let me near one).  But it was an opportunity to spend time with Jim, so off we went.  It wasn’t a large show, just a small one at the National Guard Armory in Dayton, Tennessee.  But this man loves all things “gun”, no matter the venue. 

   I was surprised that we were asked if we had any weapons on us as we entered the show. A smiling man was ready to take our firearms and “check “them, just like you might “check” your overcoat at a nice restaurant.  That was a first for me. Why would you carry your gun to a gun show anyway? And why do they want my gun if indeed I'm packing. Is it a safety issue? You give up your gun to go into a room full of guns. Why should I be the only one without a gun?  I’m still trying to figure this one out. 

Pretty!!!

 

   We perused the 20 or so gun and knife vendors for about 45 minutes. Jim was in hog heaven and I was bored stupid.  If he had any real money to spend, his pockets would have been empty in 10 minutes! He looked like me when I’m at the Mall of Georgia!  He was downright giddy!  He was indeed in his happy place! Well, I decided that a shopping opportunity is in fact a “shopping opportunity”, so surely there is something at this gun show that would interest me.
   I found a couple of pink hand guns that were really cool! But, let’s face it; no one is going to let me own a gun, ever.  So I kept looking and to my surprise I found a container of pepper spray nestled in a really cute pink leather case! That’s for me!  I’m not being stalked(as far as I know) and I don’t wonder around alone in unsafe environments,  so I’m not sure why I thought I could use this. I really just wanted to get my “shop” on. 

   Maybe that cute can of pepper spray is what got me to thinking about exercise.  If and when I do walk, I usually walk at night. It’s just more peaceful.  I was chased and bitten by a dog several years ago, so you never know what you are going to come in contact with.  Actually, when I first started on my diet, I was trying to walk 3 or 4 times a week. But every time I went out, I crossed paths with a skunk!  It really started to freak me out!  Our dog got sprayed by a skunk once and I thought we would have to move to a new house because the smell was so dreadful and so difficult to clean up! I kept imagining what sort of horror awaited me if I got sprayed by one of those skunks.  Not sure what good this pepper spray will do against a skunk. Maybe I could spray him back, just to get even. Yeah, that’s a good idea. Revenge.  And that’s why I’m not allowed to have a gun.